Hard Feelings

Lately I have been trying something bold. When difficult things happen in my life, I am allowing myself to experience the feelings that come along with them. Sounds obvious, right? The reality is that events trigger feelings, good or bad. But I seem to have become really adept at ignoring or minimizing those feelings and quickly moving on to something that I perceive will make me happy. I mean, who wants to dwell on the sad stuff when you can just skip to the next chapter? 

Don’t get me wrong, I think the desire to be happy is a valid one. But I have started to wonder if the road to figuring out what makes us happy needs to include time to truly process the hurt and disappointment that comes with the hard times (“feeling the feels,” as they say). I don’t mean continually rehashing and dwelling on them, but rather spending time truly processing things and taking stock of what we can learn from these experiences–about ourselves and what we need (or don’t need) to be healthy, healed, and content.

Feelings are hard, but if we ignore them or stuff them down, we are missing an opportunity to learn and grow. While this can be so very painful, Scripture tells us that God gives beauty from the ashes (Isaiah 61:3), but I am learning that we must spend time in the valley in order to experience the transformation. I am thankful that I have such dear friends and family to walk through these times with me, but ultimately I know that My Savior is my strength and comfort in the midst of all the hard feelings. And I believe He will bring me out stronger on the other side.